I hate being lonely

I really hate being lonely. I got married so I wouldn't be lonely. But here I am alone. My husband is deployed. But hey that is the life I signed up for when I married him. I know there would be times when he would be gone for a few days or a few months. And worst case scenario a year. But just because I signed up for doesn't mean I have to be happy that he is gone. It has bee a month and a week already. Yes I am keep track. Probably not smart, makes time go by slower some would say. But man is time flying. Its awesome how fast time is flying by. Before I know he will be back and we will be able to be us again. With just enough time before he has to leave again. I did not really know what I was getting into when I married him. But I would do all over again if I could. He might miss a few anniversaries, birthdays, child births, but hey I am married to the man that I love. And in the end that is all that matter. :0)

holy shit

I forgot all about this blog site. I found it and decided I wanted to update some stuff. I realized that I could not remember my password. It took me an hour to figure out what e-mail I used and another fucking hour to find the e-mail password. Then another damn hour to log on to this blog with the Google shit. Google is taking over the world. What is that all about? Anyway I just found it so annoying that I had to go through so much shit just to sign on an write something that no one will ever read. I figure it is a good way to vent. I don't have to worry about upsetting people. Well actually I don't really care about that. It has been a long time since I last posted on this site. 3 years to be exact. A lot has changed, I am out of the military, married, and going back to school. Its great. Any way it is really late, or really fucking early, however you want to look at it, so I am going to bed.

Piece

Back to America

Well I have just moved back to America. And I am very disappointed! I have been overseas for almost three years and have missed a lot of what is happening in the news. Now I move back expecting to hear about all the good stuff America is doing and what the Americans are doing. But no all I hear about is how people are blaming everyone else for NATURAL DISASTERS. I am sorry but no one is to blame except everyone!! What we are not realizing is that this is all happening because of the way we are treating our Mother Earth. And I am not surprised. What I am surprised about is how people are reacting to what is happening. Very "Un-American" of us. Wake up America and quit blaming other people and learn of to take the blame.
I love this country and am very happy to be home. Please realize that we have to take care of our selves no matter who or what we are. In the end we are all AMERICAN!!!

Rock Paper Scissors

I UNDERSTAND THAT SCISSORS CAN BEAT PAPER AND I GET HOW
ROCK CAN BEAT SCISSORS. BUT THERE'S NO FUCKING WAY PAPER CAN BEAT ROCK. PAPER IS SUPPOSED TO MAGICALLY WRAP AROUND ROCK LEAVING IT IMMOBILE? WHY THE HELL CAN'T PAPER DO THIS TO SCISSORS? SCREW SCISSORS, WHY CAN'T PAPER DO THIS TO PEOPLE? WHY AREN'T SHEETS OF COLLEGE-RULED NOTEBOOK PAPER CONSTANTLY SUFFOCATING STUDENTS AS THEY ATTEMPT TO TAKE NOTES IN CLASS? I'LL TELL YOU WHY, BECAUSE PAPER CAN'T BEAT ANYBODY, A ROCK WOULD TEAR THAT SHIT UP IN TWO SECONDS. WHEN I PLAY ROCK/PAPER/SCISSORS I ALWAYS CHOOSE ROCK. THEN WHEN SOMEBODY CLAIMS TO HAVE BEATEN ME WITH THEIR PAPER I CAN PUNCH THEM IN THE FACE WITH MY ALREADY CLENCHED FIST AND SAY "OH SHIT I'M SORRY, I THOUGHT PAPER WOULD PROTECT YOU, ASSHOLE."

Someone sent this to me and I thought it made so much sense.

Things to Fix

Its funny how everything these days have a "How To..." book on them. Is life really so broken that we have to have books on how to fix ourselves? I now have to read a book on "How to fix my self esteem". for every positve "how to" book there should be a negative "how to" book. like "How to loose weight fast" should be followed by "How to get really fat", and "How to make him love you" should have "How to get rid of stalkers". Come on is the world really in this much need. Do we have to have other people tell us how to fix ourselves? Are we so sad a pathetic that we can't do it ourselves? the answer is "YES"! but we can change this. All we need to do is take a stand and say "I love myself and I dont need you to tell me how to do it"!!!!!!!!!!!

To Early

Man if there is anything I hate more then being cut off in traffic it is having to wake up early to come into work just to sit on my ass for hour before anything important happens. Really what is the point, I will tell you it's because my boss wants to show me that he is in charge. He wants to prove that he is the bigger person and I am nothing but a bug on his window. At least I will get off work early and not have to deal with him all day. Plus today is my Anger Managment class, so maybe I will learn how to control my anger and not get mad about having to be at this F*#king early.

Quote of the Day

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are small matters compared to what lies within us"
~Ralph Waldo Emerson~

Why????????????

Why is it that when we think life is going good something has to happen to bring us back down? Everytime I get happy or excited something happens that makes me realize that life is never really a happy time. And people who are have got to be on something. I tried that once and it made me worse off then before. The world wonders why people are so depressed and unhappy yet it is the world that makes us this way. As soon as I start to feel happy I have to stop myself just so that the unhappiness is not as bad as it could be. Yes I am still learning, but I wish there was more of a learning curve to life.

Ancora Imparo

A long, long time ago....Michelangelo was praised for his work on the Sistine Chapel and in various other locations. When he heard this praise, his response was:

"Ancora Imparo"--I'm Still Learning!!